Six in the Morning

For the record, I'm ill, sore and cranky as hell so read with caution. Or not. I don't give a f*k.

1. CHICKENSH*T IGGY SAYS NO F*KING COALITION: Because parliamentary democracy -- you know, like they have in Europe -- is too confusing and scary for your average Canadian, Ignatieff has to respond to accusations that he's planning another coalition to secure government by saying there's no way he'll team up with the NDP or Bloc. Fucking. Hell. So, more than two thirds of this country can vote against our resident pack of religio-fascists but they're guaranteed another minority Government of the Simpletons because the slightly more sensible parties can't team up like they would in any other democracy on the planet save one. You know what? Fuck it. It's time we just applied for statehood. It'll save the US the trouble of invading to get our water and oil. And they won't have to undermine our healthcare system from afar any more either. And you can all help get Palin elected in 2012. Congratulations. (Globe and Mail)

2. TORONTO GETS $190MILLION, SASK HOUSING STILL SUCKS: How can you tell there's an election on the horizon? Well, sign one: Harper's buying Toronto votes with $190 milion in infrastructure funding. Yeah, I'm playing the "Toronto hater" card. Sue me. Thing is, this pisses me off because Regina's vacancy rate is till under 2 per cent and all the federal infrastructure money for housing that's out there is essentially useless to us because it's only supposed to be used to rehabilitate existing rental stock. Why is that? Because Toronto needs to rehabilitate its existing rental stock. Saskatchewan cities, on the other hand, need new rental stock. But we can't use infrastructure money to build any because the feds say we can't. And instead of sending us some new money to build some, or removing that absurd restriction -- like our provincial and municipal governments have been screaming for them to do -- the feds are up and giving more money to Toronto. Why? Because they need more votes in Ontario. But they don't need your Saskatchewan votes because the shitting bastards already have them. (Globe and Mail)

3. F*KING DOWNTOWN PLAN MEETING FINALLY F*KING SCHEDULED: At the Wednesday Regina Planning Commission meeting, they scheduled a special meeting for September 18 to go over the Downtown Neighbourhood Plan. You'd think I'd be all sunny and happy at the news but today, all I can say is, about fucking time. As you may recall, this was supposed to go before RPC in May but the meeting was postponed to give it more "soak time." During this "soak time," developers were given a chance to provide more input into the plan and the plan was adjusted to accomodate their concerns and confusions. (To be fair, anyone could provide input at that point, only, despite the best efforts of the prairie dog, few outside the development community knew this extra delay was taking place because nobody pays any fucking attention to municipal politics unless it has to do with their dome stadium or parking.) Throughout this, I've been assured there's no conspiracy to water down the plan going on here. And I've been assured that the even newer, revised post-extra-(some-would-say-superfluous)-consultation-with-developers Downtown Neighbourhood Plan would be up on the city website in plenty of time for the public to read it in advance of the RPC meeting, and any adjustments to the plan would be highlighted. Well... check the city website. No mention of the Downtown Plan on the front page. And as far as I can tell, the pdfs that are buried in the housing section there right now are the same as the ones that were up in May. Thanks for the lead time on that, guys. Were I in a better mood, I'd be willing to give everyone the benefit of the doubt on this one, but not today, sorry the fuck.

4. ACTIVISTS PLAN PROTEST OF ANTI-CHRIST'S SASKATOON VISIT: George Bush is coming to Saskatoon and protests are being planning. Yahoo. Protest away. Biggest protests on the planet were organized to stop the Iraq War and you saw how fucking successful that was. Look. According to some very scientific statistics I just pretended to compile, two-thirds of people living on the prairies want this guy as their lord and master. And they will make sure that W has nary an inkling that some tiny minority are out on the streets waving signs. (Leader Post)

5. SOME F*KING GUY WITH MORE MONEY THAN SENSE WANTS TO BUY SOME F*KING SH*TTY HOCKEY TEAM: I. Don't. Fucking. Care. But I can't escape the fucking story so I'm sharing all the pointless glory of it with you. (Globe and Mail and pretty much everywhere else)

6. FRENCH IMPOSING TAX TO SAVE HUMANKIND, CANADIANS STILL FLINCH AT THE "T" WORD: Sarkozy announces a carbon tax and vows to lead the fight against climate change. Try to do the same thing here and even our ostensibly left wing political party will sabotage your ass. (Sorry Layton, I'm never forgiving you for undermining the Green Shift. It was good fucking policy and you shat on it you opportunistic bastard. And now I'm going to stare into my crystal ball and predict the fortune of the NDP in the upcoming election. WHOo-OOO-oo-ooo. Oh, lookee: 18% of the popular vote. Way to bring the party into the mainstream, Jack. Keep up the good work.) Meanwhile, in Canada it's still political suicide to suggest you're in favour of any kind of taxation even if it's to keep the country out of the fucking poorhouse.